After the chaos that was last week – with visitors, many family gatherings, the holiday, Laurel’s birthday, few work hours, and Laurel’s rough transition to kindergarten – I was feeling a tad defeated.
This weekend I decided to get back in the driver’s seat. First, I started by asking Jon for help with things I normally (nonsensically) reserve for work hours (errands, getting my hair cut, housework, etc.). This may seem minor, but my default is to shoulder the burden of minutia on my own. Second, I charted out a block schedule for this week; concretely laying out how to spend my hours and slotting in my to do’s. Even though I’m short on work hours this week (school randomly closed tomorrow, event Thursday during the day, etc.), I felt much calmer laying it all out and having some firm direction. (In fact, I need to finish this post in 4 minutes and move on to the next thing.)
And third, I started the week by KICKING SOME ASS. Since July, I’ve slowly been working my way through the Couch to 5K running plan (as part of a mixed fitness plan) and today I RAN 20 MINUTES STRAIGHT.
This, from someone who has always thought she couldn’t run.
Though I tend to be very confident in my ability to get stuff done, I wasn’t feeling so certain about this running thing. Yes, I’ve been making it through the Couch to 5K plan, but the run intervals have been between 1.5 – 5 minutes. When I looked at this week, where the run intervals all of a sudden went from 5 to 8 minutes and then to today’s big 20 minute stretch, I was dubious.
But bolstered by Bill‘s comment that at this point I’ve got the strength and the game is now mental, I set out. It’s a perfect fall day in Boston. I ran by a lake where I could watch the scenery and distract myself thinking about design projects. I thought about the bravery of Amelia Sprout, who recently committed to a 5K (which I’ve been too chicken to do so far). I thought about Kristen burning up the pavement, even while traveling with engorged boobs. I refused to look at my stopwatch until I hit some major landmarks that were well into the route. I tried as hard as I could to breathe steadily and keep my body and face relaxed. I remembered the joy that I was doing something for myself. I wore my Mominatrix tee so I’d have Kristen on my back (literally) with every foot fall.
And similar to when I posted pictures of myself in a bikini, I’m a tad in disbelief. Oh yes I did. Again.